I wrote a list once of things I would cut people off for, and what I would do leading up to it: http://jewelfox.dreamwidth.org/25014.htmlI feel it's kind of harsh, but I also feel like I can't even maintain self-respect if I have to be around people like that. I wish no one had to put up with them.
I've never really cut someone out of my life... I have set boundaries, and I've had people who didn't like those boundaries, and they chose not to be in my life. (Which is their right.)I've heard it said that if you hold your boundaries with abusive people, they will eventually get tired of trying to control you (and you not being controlled), and they'll find people TO control. But that puts the burden of not being abused on the target/victim/person instead of on the actual abuser... which is frustrating.I haven't read your list yet - I'll go do it now. :) Thanks!!
I just read your list, and couldn't figure out how to comment on your blog. (I'm a dork, and I know it.)I really appreciated the commenter that said you don't have to have a reason to not spend time with someone... You actually get to choose what you do, with whom, and when. (Those of us that have been abused have had our boundaries SO blurred, it's hard to understand... especially when we're dealing with abusers who also have very blurred boundaries. We think we have to do what everyone else wants us to do, and they think we have to do what they want us to do. It's VERY confusing.)
Love that! That is something I'm working on right now. By the way I'm Kate from the CFC group. :)