Friday, November 27, 2009

The answer is... Slippers?

I'm not sure what prompted me, but I wore slippers to the horses. I brought my boots too, and I normally would have put them on before going to get Sunny. I just didn't feel like it.

As I walked up to his stall, I quickly realized that I could not walk in AT ALL to get him. There was too much crap (haha... literally) on the ground, and I wasn't going to go in with my slippers. Next thing I knew, Sunny had walked to the gate and put his head out of it by the time I had opened it. I didn't have to set a single foot in.

I didn't think much about it at the moment, but then...

Normally Sunny is slow to come to me, if he does at all. Often, I stand there feeling rejected, sad, and desperate. I NEED him to come to me. I don't understand why I can't just walk up to him. Why do I expect him to walk to me? I SHOULD go to him. But I can't, because that's not right, and I need to do it right, I need to be strong, and hold my boundaries, but why should I be so demanding... I feel so much doubt and confusion when I walk up to his stall.

Today, there was no confusion. I just wasn't going to walk up to him, and it was like he knew that, and he responded to it. And I wish I knew how to repeat it... without wearing slippers...

1 comment:

  1. Robyn seems to think that the answers to all life's problems are somehow related to shoes. Maybe she's right. It's all in the footwear.